This has been a couple of gruelling weeks.
I saw my shrink who decided that whilst I was waiting to see if I'd be assessed for autism, she would diagnose Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder due to my ritualistic behaviour.
Are shrinks on commission if they 'find' a new diagnosis?
She prescribed agomelatine (initially she wanted me back on an antipsychotic just for sleep, but I said no way. The side effects aren't worth it) for sleep and to calm the 'OCD' tendencies. For a couple of days, I slept better. Then on day 4, I became very hyper and by day 5 was running and dancing around a supermarket. By the evening, I felt restless and aggressive. The Boyfriend held out his palms for me to punch to get the aggression out, but the only thought in my head was that I wanted to beat the shit out of him. This was extremely distressing as I love him very much; I think it was because he was the only other person in the room. So, I stopped taking it and after a few days calmed down.
I saw my GP today who said my shrink should stop throwing medications at me as they rarely agree with me and if it is autism, it can't be drug-treated.
So, tired and nervy. Moving soon and the packing is nearly done. Letting agents did a viewing while I was out and when they left, didn't double-lock the door or set the alarm. Cue anxiety.
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